I can't believe it has been more than two months since we got the news. But I go back and I can describe myself like... Leyla before Andy cancer and Leyla after Andy's Cancer.
The first big sign of this is my new wrinkles, and the way I aged in the last two months. Haha! No, just kidding, well not kidding But u have to learn so much with this experience, and it is not over yet! But today I don't want to talk about me.. I want to talk about Andy Moss. And, who he is.
Andy Moss is a wonderful man, he really is, he is always thinking about others.
I remember after we got married we used to go back o Mexico twice a year. The first time we went back, he insisted that he needed to change some Mexican pesos, he didn't want to say why, but every time we were walking in the streets of Mexico, every time a homeless asked him for money, he had a little plastic bag ready with cash to give to the poor.
Andy did his mission in Veracruz Mexico. They say he was such a good missionary. He helped a lot of people to get baptized, he was a mission leader and everybody in Mexico loved him.
That's another quality about him, he makes people love him, everywhere he goes he makes friends. Everywhere he goes he makes people love him, even little kids.
We used to have a primary calling in our church. We actually were in the primary for 6 or 7 years, and in every single class that we had, he always had kids following him around. Really the kids never cared about me because all of the attention was always with Brother Moss..
Andy is a fighter. He always sets the goal in his head to be the best at everything that he does, no matter if it's sports (he plays baseball and soccer), he has to be the best. Same thing at work. Just an example is this last job that he got. A few weeks after he started, he was already one of the best .
He is so much fun. Omgsh, this is probably one of my favorite things about him. His sarcasm and jokes are the best. He can be so serious and then he says the funniest thing that can make you laugh non stop. I also used to find him sometimes doing backflips in the middle of the family room or going crazy on the trampoline with the kids!
Speaking about the kids, he is such an amazing dad, a really amazing dad! He loves his kids more than anything. Before this Cancer, he used to come home and took over with the kids. He helped me with them, getting them ready for bed, reading them books, always wrestling with David, always teaching him how to play sports, letting Mia paint his nails, singing songs with her, playing with her babies, coloring with them, jumping on the trampoline with them. Really, all of his afternoons were for my kids. No matter how good or bad his days were at work, he always had time and energy and always wanted to be with the kids.
He is one of the most romantic persons that I know. I remember we used to write notes to each other every single day for two years. He always made arrangements for our anniversaries and my birthday. He brought me a serenade, and flowers. He made surprise dinners for me. I remember one day, on Valentine's, he had dinner ready for me on his parents balcony with lights, flowers and he played a song for me in his guitar... he is so sweet and so loving.
He spoils me so much. He lets me be crazy and do my crazy stuff and he supports me with everything. Since I was around 5 years old I started being fan of this Latin singer, Gloria Trevi, omgsh I was crazy about her. One day, she came to Arizona, and I was pregnant with David. She was going to sign CDs, and I told Andy I needed to be the first one in line. He took me and he stood with me for 6 hours waiting for Gloria Trevi. Haha! When Gloria Trevi came, I started crying! Haha (weird)! He was so embarrassed! LOL! But he didn't say anything, he took a picture and he gave me a hug while I cried and cried. Haha! He always does anything to see me happy...
He is so spiritual. He is the kind of person that won't take a decision in his life before praying. Any small or big decision has to have a prayer before. I remember when we just got married I was new in the church and I wasn't used to praying as much as he does, and I always wanted to make crazy decisions fast and usually right at the moment. He always used to tell me, let's pray about it. At that point, it drove me crazy, but I learned the reason why, and now I am so grateful for his knowledge and obedience to listen to the spirit for every single step of his and our lives.
He is such an honest person, sometimes this drives me crazy too. Not that I am not honest, but man his honesty is perfect. It is amazing. From telling the cashier that she gave us more change than she was suppose to to give, to paying an honest tithe.
Heavenly Father is the most important thing in Andy's life and I admire this. His testimony about the Lord and his testimony about the church are something that I can't even explain with words... Probably some of you know that my dad has been pretty inactive in the church. He went back to the Catholic church and we all were okay with it. We thought he was never going to go back to the Lds church, and even that my heart hurt so much about this, I promised myself that I was going to love my dad no matter what, and I was not going to try to push him for any reason to go back to the church. I knew Heavenly Father was going to find the way to make this happen. But me and Andy prayed for months and months to have my family back, to see them enjoy life.
When we found about Andy's cancer, my parents came to Arizona. They live in Mexico. They came to spend some time with us. I remember one night my mom stayed at my sister's house and my dad decided that he wanted to stay at our house. It was late at night when Andy, my dad, and I were sitting at the dinner table and my dad started talking about the church. He said, "Andy, I believe everything that you say and I want you to tell me why should I stop going to the catholic church. Tell me one thing that is going to make me go back and I will believe you." Andy said, "Juan, it is hard for me to give you one reason that it will make you go back to the church, but all that I can tell you is that I have a big testimony that the church is true. Juan, I know that Heavenly Father is watching over you, over your family, I know that he wants you to go back, but he is waiting for you to pray about it. You need to find your own answer, you need to pray about it. I can tell you that I know that we have a true prophet. I have a testimony that the prophet is here to guide us, to tell us how much our Father in Heaven loves you. And Juan, I know that the spirit will come back to you, to your life, you just need to pray about it. But I can tell you that I have a testimony that the church of Jesus Christ of Later Day Saints is true." I was crying, I couldn't stop crying like a little kid. The spirit in that room was so strong that I could almost see it. My dad's face changed and a tear was coming from him. Oh how much I love my Andy and his big testimony, and his amazing spirit! After that day, my dad hasn't gone back to the catholic church, and he used to go to a mass every single day. Well he went back to the church, and he hasn't missed a meeting and I can already see the change in him.
Andy has been amazing for me, for my family, his faith is keeping me strong, his faith is bigger than anything, his faith is so strong that I reach out to it every time that I am about to fall...
When he found out that he had a big tumor, he went to the doctor by himself because we never imagined that this was going to happen. He called me on the phone, I was driving from work on my way to pick my daughter up at my sister's house. He said, "the doctors found something but I need you to get to Jona's (my sisters) house and I will call you when you are there." I knew something was wrong right then. He never makes me wait like this. I got to Jona's house and I was already having a panic attack. Finally, he called. I went to another room where my daughter couldn't hear me and he told me, that they found an 11 CM tumor and they wanted him to see a surgeon. He said, "hey, don't worry about it. I have this strong feeling that everything is going to be okay. I have to hang up because I am here still at the doctor's but please, don't cry. I feel that everything is going to be okay."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. They just told him he has a huge tumor but he is okay? He is not panicking? He feels everything is going to be okay? I hung up and I went to my sister's front yard and I called my mom in Mexico. I was yelling and asking why. I was screaming on the phone. Than, I threw up right there, literally my knees dropped to the floor, and I was screaming and crying at the same time as my mom was. I don't wish this feeling to anyone. I felt that the world was ending right there. It was such a horrible sad feeling that just to remember it makes me cry. I tried to control myself and I went back home to meet Andy. He didn't go back to work, he came back to see me. We put Mia down for a nap and I started crying even more. He was so calm. He said, "let's pray about it.", We prayed, we hugged each other for probably more than an hour. He was so calm and I know everything was because he always gets his answers by praying and he really knew more than me... that everything was going to be okay...
Of course he has had his moments of doubt. Of course he is afraid sometimes. He is human. But, he amazes me with his strength. He amazes me with his faith, with his courage to fight against this monster.
I love him so much, he really is such a good person. He's an amazing dad and a loving husband...
PS If I have to say one bad thing about Andy, that would be that he NEVER answers his phone! Haha! Love you, Andy!
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