A Timeline and details of Andy's surgery

Andy is doing okay... He has a lot of pain and he couldn't sleep last night. He was up since 12 and finally fall asleep around 7 am... He has oxygen, a catheter and something else to drain the blood from his chest. He is in the Cardiothoracic ICU... Why do we say that his surgery is an act of faith and a miracle? Well when we saw the surgeon at her office she said that she was going to do a Sternogomy she explained to us how she was going to cut his chest bones remove his nerve and probably cut a little piece of his heart ... When we came in for the surgery his doctors talked to us and they said that they got together and talked about Andy's case and they came to the conclusion that they were going to give it a try and operate just with the camera on his right side of his chest. They said pretty much don't get excited it is just a 20% chance that this can be successful, if it works we will just make a bigger incision to vacuum the tumor from his side and this should take around 2 to 3 hours but if this doesn't work we are going to have to close that incision and open his chest like we had planed before... When the surgeon came to talk to us before surgery I told her that a LOT of people were praying for her and she said, "for me? No, pray for him." and we told her yes for you too and she just smiled.. So they took him in... To be honest I lost it while he was in surgery, I tried and tried to be okay I prayed in my heart and I just couldn't get peace in my heart I was so nervous and so worried for him. He left me a note that said to read it when they take me in, so I did, and it was so funny how much Andy knows me because the first words in his note said Can you please stop crying??? Lol he knows me so good. We were waiting there. I took some time to write and cry, my mother and father in law where there the entire time waiting for Andy. We got a phone call telling us that things were going okay. We had to wait a little longer and then finally the Doctor came ... She said Andy did really good, everything went good we did everything with the camera and we didn't have to open his chest, we were able to remove the tumor the tumor was pretty big still (they told us this morning that it was bigger than they expected it to be) but they got it all out, she said they were able to leave his nerve intact and they didn't have to cut part of his heart. They are sending the big tumor to pathology. She said they are going to see if the tumor doesn't have any active cancer cells. Andy should be done with everything but if it does she said probably our Oncologist will want Andy to have radiations... She also said that they removed the other small tumor and great news it was benign no cancer in that one 😊 she showed us and gave us the pictures of everything and I have her a hug. I just had to. I started crying happy tears so many happy tears I was so happy for him to be closer to the end. I was so happy to know that my Heavenly Father hasn't left us alone not even for a minute. I was so happy to remember that all he wants us to do is be okay and happy. I was amazed with the power of prayers I mean just a 20% chance and it worked? That is a miracle for us not having to open his chest bones and being able to remove absolutely everything without damaging anything at all is an answer to or prayers. I am full if joy and happiness. I am so thankful with every single one of you that took a minute and said a prayer for Andy and the doctors ... After that I wasn't able to see him because he wasn't awake yet but it was such a happy moment when I got to call my mom and my sister and more family and my best friend and the great news ... After about an hour or so I got to see Andy again, he was talking here and there and he kept asking me if he said funny things. He was also asking me did you eat? Did you eat? Always worrying for me and the kids .. When the nurse came to talk to me she said all Andy is taking about are his kids, he told me David loves to play baseball and Mia loves to sing, you have a beautiful family she said... That's Andy a loving husband and dad that even when he is not awake he keeps thinking about us... We were there until 8 pm and then they moved him to a room In The Cardiothoracic ICU. It was sad to see how they moved him because he was in a lot of pain... He got some sleep for like 9 pm until 12 and then he couldn't sleep with all nurses in and out doctors, X-rays, labs and more... They gave him a pain button but they told me I can't push it from him so if he sleeps he doesn't push it and when he wakes up then he can't stand the pain but they said the pain should get less and less. Andy is such a fighter I am so proud of him he is doing amazing and I know we are getting closer to the end of this trial at least for now ...

Something else that hapend to me yesterday, I called my brother in the morning, he wanted to talk to Andy, he loves Andy, he always did, and he was so sad about yesterday, my mom told me Johnny, my brother, was crying a lot after Andy talked to him, she said he was having a really hard time not being able to be here with us... Johnny has been a little inactive in the church for few weeks maybe months, I called him again last night after Andy was done with his surgery and he started crying and he said you are not going to believe what hapend to me, right after we were done talking this morning I started crying and praying so hard and right at that moment someone came to my door, it was the missionaries!!! And I can't believe how they came when I needed to hear from them, I am so sorry that I haven't been at church I am going back this Sunday 😊 Once again I am so thankful that we are so close to our Heavenly Father, I can't imagine living this trial without him right next to us... 

During surgery

Well I am sitting here at the waiting area waiting for Andy.. and I am not sure why I am trying to write at this moment but I guess I need to get out what I am feeling right now, not sure if I should share it or not but here I am trying to keep things on paper so one day me, Andy and my kids can know about everything..

Andy had a good day yesterday, after they told us that he was not going to have surgery yesterday, he felt pretty okay about it, we knew it was the right thing to do so we just went back home. We had a long long nap and he got to spend more time with the kids. He kept David up until 10 pm playing video games and this morning he got up and play with Mia and he let her put some make up on him haha... Its like if Mia knew what was going on, she kept hugging him and kissing him all morning, right before we left we took some pictures ..

We left the house and we went over to David's school to say hi to him, Andy wanted to give him a dollar so he could buy an Ice at the school, David didn't know we were going so he was pretty excited when he saw Andy.  We took some more pictures there.

I remember that afternoon when we found out that Andy had cancer, the oncologist told us, surgery is a possibility, and here we are, waiting for him while he is in surgery...
I am not sure what to feel or what to think, millions of things are going around in my head, I am feeling a little afraid, a little nervous, a little sad, well not a little, a lot, I am trying to tell myself that he is going to be okay that this is just one more step on our journey but seriously, who wouldn't be sad while knowing that they are opening your husband and messing around with his heart...who can be okay knowing that they will cut a part of his lungs, I know that a lot of people in the world do this, but Andy, my Andy...
I need to trust what I was promised. I need to remember that he is going to be okay but right now all I feel is scared, afraid.

Like I told him, I feel so sorry that he has to do this, I love him so so much that I wish it was me the one that was on that table right now, I love him with all of my heart and I couldn't let go of his hand, I think I was holding his hand for the past 2 hours I didn't want to let it go I just want to see him and tell him how much I love him..

Andy and me had such a hard time right before we got married, some of you don't know but Andy did his mission in Mexico and that's where we met, so when he was done with his mission, we saw each other in Salt Lake City, Utah, and the very first day that we saw each other, right then, at the very first time that we were able to sit next to each other, he looked at my eyes and asked me if I wanted to get married to him, and right that moment, without thinking, I told him yes, what were we thinking - who knows, but we felt that it was the right thing to do, he told me, I have been praying about it and I had my answer, I want to spend the eternity with you and all he had was a CTR ring with him and that's all we needed, we hadn't even had our first kiss right at that point but we didn't need to kiss, we didn't need a ring, we knew that we were meant for each other and that's how everything started.. It took us a year to get married and it was such a hard year, for different reasons but a lot of people didn't want us to get married and now I understand why, I mean what a crazy idea, get married with someone that you don't know? True love like Ana from frozen said, but it can really happen, it happened to me , and Andy was so strong with his decision, he always knew that he wanted to get married to me and he didn't care about comments or disappointment he decided to fight strong and get married to me, and after a year we did, we got married and I can tell you that it was the easiest decision that we have ever made... We have been so happy together, we are the kind of couple that can't be apart from each other, we are always laughing together, watching our crazy TV shows together, we love to spend time with each other, and I am so grateful to have him with me, he really is such a good guy...

Last Sunday at church they were talking about trials, they were saying trials are here for a reason, is not just that Heavenly Father wants to make you sad or wants you to suffer, trials have a purpose and one of them is to teach you what you were suppose to learn here on earth, trials are here to make you complete, to make you stronger, to make you smarter, to make you kind but the most important here, trials are here with the promise that if you are strong and live them you will be back with our Heavenly Father one day...
I am here living the hardest trial in my life, I am not sure if I already learned what I was suppose to learn, I am not sure if I still have more to learn about this trial but I know that I want to be with my Heavenly Father one day, and if I had to live this trial again I would happily do it all over again..
I also know what I already learned from this trial, I learned that life is so short, you can't be wasting your life in things that aren't really important, don't worry about your job, about your financial situation, don't worry about what car you want or where are you going to go on vacations, worry about how close you are with Heavenly Father, worry about how much your family is important to you, worry about loving your husband and tell him and thank him for everything that he does for you and your kids, thank him and give him the importance that he deserves, don't spend your time making him worry about things that are not really important, as long as you have him there with you and healthy, truly there is nothing else that matters, enjoy the time with your kids, love them, teach them hug them, once again, life is so short and so crazy and you never know what trial is about to come to your door, love love love so when this trial comes, you are ready for it, you are strong for it and you have no regrets..
That's one of the things that I learned from Andy, I kept asking him, is there anything that you want to do before surgery? Is anything that you want to eat, somewhere you want to go, something, and he always said, Leyla, nothing, all I want is to be with you and the kids, there is nothing else that I want to do, there is no other important thing for me other than that

So I feel like I should be done writing for right now, maybe I will write 20 posts today but all I want to say is that please please don't wait until a trial comes to your life to actually live life
we love to spend time with each other, and I am so grateful to have him with me, he really is such a good guy...
Last Sunday at church they were talking about trials, they were saying trials are here for a reason, it's not just that Heavenly Father wants to make you sad or wants you to suffer, trials have a purpose and one of them is to teach you what you were suppose to learn here on earth, trials are here to make you complete, to make you stronger, to make you smarter, to make you kind but the most important here, trials are here with the promise that if you are strong and live them you will be back with our Heavenly Father one day...
I am here living the hardest trial in my life, I am not sure if I already learned what I was suppose to learn, I am not sure if I still have more to learn about this trial but I know that I want to be with my Heavenly Father one day, and if I had to live this trial again I would happily do it all over again..
I also know what I already learned from this trial, I learned that life is so short, you can't be wasting your life in things that aren't really important, don't worry about your job, about your financial situation, don't worry about what car you want or where are you going to go on vacations, worry about how close you are with Heavenly Father, worry about how much your family is important to you, worry about loving your husband and tell him and thank t him for everything that he does for you and your kids, thank him and give him the importance that he deserves, don't spend your time making him worry about things that are not really important, as long as you have him there with you and healthy, truly there is nothing else that matters, enjoy the time with your kids, love them, teach them hug them, once again, life is so short and so crazy and you never know what trial is about to come to your door, love love love so when this trial comes, you are ready for it, you are strong for it and you have no regrets..
That's one of the things that I learned from Andy, I kept asking him, is there anything that you want to do before surgery? Is anything that you want to eat, somewhere you want to go, something, and he always said, Leyla, nothing, all I want is to be with you and the kids, there is nothing else that I want to do, there is no other important thing for me other than that